Jury Duty

I listened to a Supertones CD today that I haven't listened to in a looooong time. I had one song in mind to listen to, but ended up listening to (quite LOUDLY!, which was a nice release... I'm gonna give the guys to the right of me a run for their money, just you wait) the whole thing, and was reminded of what amazingly true lyrics the songs have.

One of the songs (Jury Duty) that had become my favorite years ago had these lines in the chorus:
"I don't always thank You for the rough days
And the hard times in my life,
Even though I should."

I put it on repeat for a few rounds. Talk about a reminder about how far I am from where I should be in terms of my relationship with God and spiritual life. Not to say I'm using any certain marker to determine where "should" really is, but I just don't feel, personally, like I'm "there." There are several ideas in my head as to why-- most having to do just with where life has taken me (literally all over! not just in terms of geographically but in other ways, too) these past couple of years.

Basically, today had some highs and today had some (pretty crappy) lows. The lows, I wish wouldn't have happened, but then again, I probably wouldn't be in the mindset I am right now, if it/they hadn't have happened. The more non-tactful way of putting it is that sometimes we all need a swift kick in the ass to finally realize one thing or another. Yeah. I said ass. But... it ties in with the lyrics to Jury Duty. I should be thankful for these moments... I really should be. God has them happen for a reason; as much as I forget it sometimes, they are the things that are helping and molding me into who and what I am, and creating the passions that are, in turn, opening doors for my future. "I don't always thank You for the rough days and the hard times in my life, even though I should." I'll be saying some words of thanks tonight, I'm sure.

The short of the lows is that I need to practice stepping back from situations before I act on them. In most cases, this means THINKING about what I say (when I'm upset, or whatever) before I actually SAY it. I do an OK job most of the time, but let's face it, nobody's perfect (and I'm far from it). In other cases, this means I need to get a grip, or a hold on myself, before I allow myself to become too emotional about something, whether inwardly or outwardly. If there's anything I've learned through all of these experiences I've had during college, it's that nothing is ever permanent. Things change, and if they don't, then they should. There's no use getting worked up about something that really isn't the end of the world either way. Also, I get frustrated when I allow people to "control" how I'm feeling, but then again, we're talking about feelings. If I'm going to be upset about something, I'm going to be upset about something, and that's that. Feelings and emotions aren't things that can or should be stifled, or treated as though they can or should be turned off at a moment's notice. Truth is, they can't be. And if it's are, then it isn't healthy. So I GUESS the case is that, today, I experienced emotions in a healthy way (although it may not have been in the most positive way, how I handled it). But, as the saying goes (and yes, another naughty word is coming up-- apparently I'm becoming a sailor), shit happens. We have to pack things up and move along.

The rest of the day happened, and am I ever glad that it did (it allowed me to pack up and move along, like I just said). Timing was actually quite strange... not strange, actually. Wonderful. Something went terribly with one friend (?) and then something went great with another-- and I got a surprise call from Todd, with whom I hadn't talked on the phone for a couple of weeks (which was a change after talking 'til all hours of the morning, catching up at camp and then several times on the phone after I'd gotten home). I asked if he'd utilized my campus address recently, and he 'fessed up-- the pajamagram WAS from him. (Once again, not surprised by that.) The convo went great, and was a nice release from all of the other day's events (and the realness with which we both spoke was a real relief). Everything after that went well. The "open door policy" that RAs typically implement (basically, whenever we're in our rooms, we try to have our doors open so people can be welcoming to other people or so we can just be interacting instead of shutting people out) was re-affirmed as a wonderful thing, as my friend Crystal stopped by and saw me as my door was open (as well as several other people, but Crystal's visit meant the most to me) and we had a short, but good, heart-to-heart. Both of us had had an up-and-down day, and although we barely mentioned anything about what the issues at hand were, we seemed to connect on how we felt, anyway. She's somebody I didn't get to know until the last part of the semester last year, and I'm making a goal of spending a lot more time with her this year. As a side note, she's already asked me if I'd work together with her to plan the Women's Retreat this year, and I've (of course!) accepted. I can't wait. But anyway.

More ups from today (b/c, after all, what's the point of dwelling on the downs?): my new students on the floor ROCK. After taking them on a personal tour to help them find where their classes will be tomorrow, I ended up chillin' on the futon in one room and talking with the gals there (and another guy who was hanging out there) for about a half hour. One gal in particular was asking quite a few questions-- all very mature and applicable-- and reminded me a lot of myself when I was her. Everyone seems quite respectful, which is always a relief for RAs. The difference between returning students on this floor (the party guys, basically) and the new students is VAST. It's my hope that these new students will actually end up being good examples for the returners-- the older students-- although I'm almost sure the returners are already set in their ways and practices. If nothing else, then just mutual respect on the floor... would be GREAT. I love working with Stu, my co RA-- he's SO much fun and a truly mature and decent guy (a rare breed on this campus, I think!!)-- and he's got a great attitude, so that helps a lot. Actually, the entire Liberty RA staff is absolutely amazing. Guys, girls, both. I'm truly blessed to be working with each of them.

So, classes... it's inevitable. Senior year begins TOMORROW! In just a matter of hours, actually. Am I ready? For classes, sure, why not? To leave this place, maybe not, but there's no use crying over it yet. I really think this is going to be a great year. In fact, I know it is.

Here's to this crazy, emotionally charged day. Here's to ups, and down and everything in-between, to true friends, to great phone conversations, to pick-me-up convos, to a great weekend of meeting new people and being re-united with old friends. And, of course, to classes that begin tomorrow...

Por fin.

"No, no es amor, lo que tu sientes, se llama obsesion,
una ilusion en tu pensamiento, que te hace hacer cosas, asi
funciona el corazon." --Coro de "Obsesion" por Aventura

Estas son palabras de una cancion favorita mia desde que estudie en Mexico. Las he escuchado vez tras vez, dia, tras dia, pero ahorita, por fin, realmente las puedo aplicar a mi vida (antes, fue solamente una idea general).

No: amor. Si: ilusion. Ententido.
Por fin puedo abandonar esta carcel.

still a good, good day, but

i need to consciously refuse to be owned by another being, and to remember that refusal in my mind, and to not compromise it. i hate feeling owned. it's got to stop.

it's still a good, good day, but i had to get the thought out from the back of my mind. sort of my release for the day, for the week. and now, i feel much better (at least, i think i do... we'll see).

good, good day

75-degree weather. sunshine. a refreshing breeze. families bringing their first-year college students to the dorms and saying their goodbyes for what is often the first time for many of them. parents checking and re-checking the rooms to make sure everything is "just right," first-year students' excitement (for the most part), ra and resident interaction, room contracts and keys, lofting beds. the O-team, SAB, church volunteers, SDP, and other volunteers who rush out to the new students' cars to carry things up to their room for them-- EVERYthing (oh, mom and dad-- don't you remember the good ole' days?, or rather, day?). letting parents know they should enjoy it while it lasts, 'cuz it'll be the only year it'll happen. (:D) yerba mate in tea-bag form to keep me awake (apparently i require more than 3 1/2 hrs of sleep before waking up at 6am) . instant energy. almost scaring residents and their parents b/c of said instant energy. traffic duty. inwardly hoping we (ra's) won't get run over. confused parents, not knowing how the heck to get to the residence hall they need to get to. sitting in a comfy foldable sport chair on my laptop in the street, where, yes, i get perfect wireless service (a block or two away on each side of campus, baby!). (working on the paper, of course, w/ the exception of this blog.) new student validation. brunch in the servery where parents and little siblings are spending careful moments with their children and older sibs. assuring a first-year student, who just tripped over his own feet in the forum, that the forum tiles often elevate just enough so that they trip people-- it happens all the time and is actually one of the greatest causes of casualities on campus, right after extreme laptop addiction. laughter. running into more and more friends whom i haven't seen since last semester. lots of hugs. more hugs. more friends. more energy. and more sunshine (oh, leisha like). it's a beautiful day!!!!! and it definitely means a LOT more to me today than what it has before.

here's to a great day for all!

Sorry, Scott

Here's the email I got from my advisor/Span prof this evening:

Now that you are back from your world travels, its time to get back to work! Would you like to work in the Spanish department as an AA this year?

Ok, so I'm not sure about you, but wouldn't you think that this question should be asked BEFORE the weekend before the semester begins!? I thought for sure that I'd be asked at the end of last year, but I hadn't been, so Swasti snatched me up on behalf of the Phil/Rel dept (which I've now officially declared as my minor). Sort of like a "you snooze, you lose" moment-- guess that's what happens, though, right?

still being unproductive*

*give me a break, ok?

i've been spoiled with packages in the mail the last two days. i'm talking actual packages-- not just envelopes-- and the type that get sent to mail and printing services because they're too big to fit into my mailbox. oh yes, the type i like! yesterday, it was a package of 3 wonderful-looking books and a card from allen (yahoo; mail from canada!). today, it was two packages of books from amazon.com (i'm an addict, guys, but i suppose there are worse things) and... well, something rather unexpected. anybody ever heard of a pajamagram before? i hadn't either. the return address said it was from vermont, yet it wasn't a product of one of my amazon escapades, and although i don't know anybody from vermont, i knew it had to be from somebody i know. opened it up, found a few neat goodies in the box. a potpourri sachet, a fun door hanger that says "relaxation in progress: i'm taking a mini-vacation" and other sayings around the edges, a fabulous peppermint foot scrub/pumice stone, a sewn bookmark that said to: leisha, from: ol shep HPC. hmm... ol shep? hpc? ok, so who do i know that goes by the nickname ol shep (or what deeper meaning might the name have?) from hpc (my church camp), ok, that narrows it down. then i saw a card with a typed message in it: "just a little care for those tired feet and thanks for heartfelt thoughts. wheels on the bus." ah-ha! somebody from service partnership this summer (we sang wheels on the bus only about fifty million times that week)! got to thinking about who it could be, and realized only one person has my school address. oh, man! what the heck did i do to deserve two packages in the mail on two different days from two awesome, different people!? life's funny. and i've been smilin' nonstop.

this evening was the RA picnic and time to hang out at one of the parks in town. instead of driving, a few friends and i walked there-- bare-footed! (it's about 2 miles from campus) i'd tried to get people to join me in a barefooted movement here on campus, and it's caught on with a couple of guy staffers in g/l. heck yeah! got there-- veggie burgers were on the grill for the 2 (wait, now 3! i've converted somebody!!! :)) vegetarians, ate, then went straight to throwing around the frisbee with the guys. oh, man. good times, and as usual, i surprised the heck out of them ("wow, leisha knows how to throw!"). sweated up a nice little storm until everyone had died out but nate and i, and then we moved on to the game of bocce ball that was going on with some others. when we got back to the food area, i had ice shoved down the back of my shirt by deb (director of res life), and i lovingly passed along the favor to others. you can imagine what happened from there. more good times, of course. 5 of us ended up walking back together, talking and joking and enjoying the wonderfully-weathered evening.

another great thing from today: I FINALLY HAVE CARPET!!!!!! a gal put an ad in bvu news saying she wanted to sell hers, and i responded immediately. that was this morning, and it was delivered to me by her tonight. how i'm going to actually get it down onto the floor, i haven't the slightest clue. but at least i've got carpet now. now i won't have to walk in the room and think "ugh, sucky, cold, impersonal tile!" oh, and only $35, too. not too shabby.

more residents are starting to move in, so there's quite a bit more action happening around the res halls. of course the guys on my floor are already breaking me in to their loudness and rowdiness. there's a guitar game that they play with some game system-- not sure which-- but you can basically hear it all throughout the building. how lucky that i get to be on the same floor, right? (and how lucky that i get all the male athletes from liberty. right? :-/) but anyway. loudness and craziness and all, i think it's going to be a great year. a really great year.

ok. maybe time to be productive... maybe time to get some sleep.

seafood

or rather, more appropriately titled, the productivity that doesn't happen whenever i'm supposed to be writing a paper (with special thanks to "little sis" for THE TRUTH ABOUT THE FISH after my asking if fishy was supposed to be floating on its back*)

~Heather~ says:
I think fishy is dead

Leisha Jo says:
nah, it's just sleeping

~Heather~ says:
really? tap the glass
does it move?

Leisha Jo says:
nope. deep sleeper.

~Heather~ says:
its dead

~Heather~ says:
I am sorry big sis

Leisha Jo says:
nah, just sleeping

~Heather~says:
but it has gone to the big fish bowl in the sky

Leisha Jo says:
nah

~Heather~says:
you are in denial

Leisha Jo says:
it's still in this fish bowl. i see it. it's sleeping. shhhh! don't wake it up!

~Heather~says:
nothing will wake it up

~Heather~ says:
not even a nuclear bomb

Leisha Jo says:
yeah, you've got the right idea. real deep sleeper.

~Heather~says:
LEISHA YOUR FISH IS DEAD

Leisha Jo says:
nah

~Heather~ says:
ACCEPT THE TRUTH

Leisha Jo says:
nope

~Heather~says:
fine don't complain when your room starts to stink because of your dead fish

Leisha Jo says:
my sleeping fish won't stink. the candle warmer's right next to it anyway, so it'll stay smelling like arm vanilla.

Leisha Jo says:
err, warm vanilla

~Heather~ says:
you fried him

Leisha Jo says:
darn you

~Heather~ says:
the water got to hot and he BOILED

Leisha Jo says:
well then it's a good thing i still eat seafood... right?

~Heather~ says:
NO

~Heather~. says:
you can't eat your fish

Leisha Jo says:
you're right. it's not moral to eat a live fish.

~Heather~.says:
or your dead fish

Leisha Jo says:
if that were the case, yes.

Leisha Jo says:
no! wait!

Leisha Jo says:
not the case.

~Heather~ says:
it is the case

~Heather~ says:
he is dead

Leisha Jo says:
is not

~Heather~ says:
and you killed him

Leisha Jo says:
did not

~Heather~ says:
did too

Leisha Jo says:
did not

~Heather~ says:
did too

Leisha Jo says:
did NOT

~Heather~ says:
did TOO

Leisha Jo says:
so you mean

Leisha Jo says:
maybe waiting a week to feed him wasn't the smartest idea?

~Heather~ says:
lol, probably not

Leisha Jo says:
hmm

~Heather~ says:
and boiling him might have caused an early death too

Leisha Jo says:
i thought the "feed the fish 2-3 times a day" thing was optional. seems rather high maintenance, you know?

Leisha Jo says:
i did no boiling of the fish, thankyouverymuch.

~Heather~ says:
you are horrible

Leisha Jo says:
not horrible

~Heather~ says:
remind me never to let you watch my pets

Leisha Jo says:
come on, it's just a fish

~Heather~ says:
yeah and you killed it

Leisha Jo says:
did not

Leisha Jo says:
it's just sleeping

~Heather~ says:
you just admited you killed it

~Heather~ says:
you can't take that back

~Heather~ says:
FISH KILLER!!!!!!!!!!

Leisha Jo says:
meanie head

~Heather~ says:
at least my fish is still alive

Leisha Jo says:
yeah?

Leisha Jo says:
well

Leisha Jo says:
at least...

Leisha Jo says:
i'm not short.

~Heather~ says:
WHAT!!!!????

~Heather~ says:
that is mean

Leisha Jo says:
so is your calling me a fish killer

Leisha Jo says:
it hurts my feelings, you know

~Heather~ says:
thats it we are fighting

~Heather~ says:
IGNORE

Leisha Jo says:
hehe

Leisha Jo says:
YOU CAN'T IGNORE ME!

~Heather~ says:
IGNORE

Leisha Jo says:
nope

Leisha Jo says:
you can't do it

~Heather~ says:
yes I can

Leisha Jo says:
la la la la laaaaa

Leisha Jo says:
HA! see? you didn't!

~Heather~says:
IGNORE

Leisha Jo says:
hey little sis

~Heather~says:
IGNORE

Leisha Jo says:
aren't you curious about what i brought you back from india?

~Heather~ says:
IGNORE?

Leisha Jo says:
your decision

Leisha Jo says:
la la la la laaaaa

Leisha Jo says:
here, fishy fishy fishy. let me feed to you the item i brought back for little sis from india

Leisha Jo says:
since she's ignoooooring me

~Heather~ says:
IGNORE *cause fishy is dead and won't be eating anything anytime soon*

Leisha Jo says:
i'm sure it'll wake up when i put it in the water

~Heather~ says:
IGNORE *I would come over there and ignore you personally, but I am on duty*

Leisha Jo says:
hahaha

Leisha Jo says:
sucks to be you

*sometimes acting like a child can make for a lot of fun, and a great distraction from actual work.

home stretch

i'm in the home stretch now, folks, with this online class (christian sexual ethics). only 4 more chapters to read, a quiz over the chapters, one discussion forum post and response, and one 15-20ish page paper to finish up and turn in before semester classes begin. all this combined with ra training has proved to present its challenges, but i think i'm going to make it! more random posts later.

ResLife goes to camp

Grand/Liberty loggin' it up
Originally uploaded by LeishaJo.

'twas a fabulous day at camp for the entire res life staff. group
stretches, challenge activities in smaller staff groups, a lunch
complete with a gourmet pb&j sandwich for vegetarians, rock-climbing, getting shoved into the lake about 10 times by the guys (resistance does nothing), kayaking, and of course, getting tipped over by the guys (same thing, regarding resistance, although i have to admit that i did put up a pretty good fight at first). needless to say, my whole body hurts right now-- but it's that incredible sort of hurt. i wouldn't mind feeling this way daily, although i'm sure that if i climbed more often, it wouldn't affect me in the same way after a time. i was reminded as to one of the reasons why the southwest (arizona-- phoenix area) has been my dream place to live for some time-- opportunities for climbing, right at my fingertips. oh yes, that sounds good. in these pics: grand/liberty on the log, completing one of our team challenges, and (below) me on my first climb of the day (i
started with the "easy" one!).

Pro climber; that's meeeee

I got this guys; I'm a pro
Originally uploaded by LeishaJo.

Bare-footed climbing; the best thing since sliced bread (whole grain, of course).

Jody and VJ

Jody and VJ; Miller and Michelob
Originally uploaded by LeishaJo.

Oh yeah, Michelob and Miller, too (both lite)

On the Peruvians

Jody and Leisha, Euphoria and Chow
Originally uploaded by LeishaJo.

Peruvian horses are known for being one of the smoothest rides possible on a horse. The faster it goes, the smoother it gets-- quite the opposite from the majority of horse breeds out there. We spent a while on these horses (Euphoria-- her horse; Chow-- my horse), running them in the huge, green pasture and just enjoying the afternoon/evening in South Dakota.

Bum

Horse bum
Originally uploaded by LeishaJo.

Easily entertained

Easily entertained
Originally uploaded by LeishaJo.

A bit entertained at the sight of horse poo. ("Wow, Jody, get a picture of this!")

From the garden

From the garden
Originally uploaded by LeishaJo.

This meal made Leisha very, very, very, very, verrrrry happy. (Thanks, Wildeboer family!!!)

Treeeeee

Jodes and Leish
Originally uploaded by LeishaJo.

Confirmation

Tree-hugger
Originally uploaded by LeishaJo.

For all those who were wondering, yes, I apparently am a tree-hugger.

paciencia

no es facil

methods of teaching a secondary foreign language... sh!%

Hi Leisha,
Sedu 412 has been canceled for fall 2006. Please read the note below from the dean of Education.
Peggy

>>> >>>
Peggy:

Please cancel the above course and tell Ms Reynolds that the course will be offered next semester during the first seven weeks and she will take it concurrently with student teaching. Have her contact me if she has questions.

Kline

feeling

there are some moments when i wish i could stop everything and reflect over something in particular-- an event that happened, something somebody said, something i did or didn't say, an interaction with someone else, a feeling or thought i had for some reason or another, an occurrence out of the ordinary, or maybe better yet, within the ordinary, but still special. i can't stop everything, though, and i can't always share exactly how i felt about those moments after-the-fact in a blog like this, but i know the best that i can do is just try. i sometimes blog to let others know what's going on in my life, but other times, i blog for me-- just for me. to get out those thoughts, make (or try to make) clearer whatever it is that i'm feeling or going through at the moment. i think this is one of those times.

so, if i could capture today perfectly in words, that'd be nice, but i know i can't, so i'll let that notion escape me. i do know that nothing about the day was super-duper-out-of-the-ordinary. i was around the same people, from 10am until just now (9:30pm), doing the same things that i'm relatively used to, and comfortable with. i didn't win the lottery, nobody confessed their undying love and devotion to me, there was no shopping spree involved, nobody awarded me an all-expense-paid trip to the other side of the world. that's ok. i probably don't need or want any of that stuff, anyway (although a few sound tempting). what was so great about the day was that every single moment felt real, like everything was happening as it should, like i was exactly where i needed to be, like although nothing particularly special was happening, i couldn't have been any happier. call it a revelation of sorts, it all coming down to the fact that i've got (pretty much) everything i could ever want or need, i'm healthy, i'm loved by family, i've got some good friends, i've been given the ability to communicate with and relate with people, i'm now a senior at a place that's more than just a college-- it's a family and a support system, the so-called "real world" is right ahead of me and i feel like i could handle just about anything that comes to me at the moment. of course i'll have weaker moments-- i expect them-- but today... i don't think there's such a thing. just not today.

so, today. training, lots of it. more particularly diversity training, and an opportunity to be treated as a person from a different background to more thoroughly see what it's like to walk in another's shoes. it was a simulation that involved sexual orientation (either straight or gay), gender (male or female), ethnicity (caucasian, african american, or asian), and different socioeconomic backgrounds (basically, we were handed play money at the beginning of the simulation-- some, a bunch of money, and others, not so much). there were tables around the room that we were supposed to visit: tables for a car salesperson, a wedding planner, an educational institution, a career place, and a real estate agent. we were supposed to see how far we could get with the demographics we'd each been given (which were a mystery to us at first, although the table people knew what/who we were and treated us all accordingly, and we caught on pretty quickly). i ended up being a straight black woman who was told she was lucky she graduated high school, that she'd have no place in college, who was told she probably wouldn't even be good handling fries at mcdonald's as a job, who was told that nobody would probably take her as a spouse, that she couldn't buy a car without the help of a white man who miiiight co-sign a loan for her, who could afford a little studio apartment in the ghetto living next to a weird starving artist and close enough to the bus line so she can get to and from the job that she doesn't have. i felt it. i was that person; i was treated as that person. after the simulation and after the debriefing, i still felt it. that sort of stuff sticks with me, and always has and always will-- and that's why conservative people like my cousin (will) will always consider me to be a flaming liberal, b/c of experiences like this one, and like the hunger banquet which i always inevitably end up being one of the people sitting on the floor with nothing to eat; part of the bottom, hardly-acknowledged, starving crowd that falls through the cracks of society all too often. how can a person not open their eyes, hearts, and minds to such people? are people really so into their jobs and their money that they forget that life isn't always peaches and cream like it is for them? i just can't gauge that mindset. i really can't. so anyway. most people seemed to think the exercise was a bit of a downer. of course it was a downer; it showed several pieces of reality that so many of us don't have to feel exposure to on a day-to-day basis, or for many of us, ever. to me, i think it was perfect. if we could just stay in the mindset on a daily basis, that this is the way it really is for so much of the american population (and i won't even go into the population outside this american bubble; it's enough and sometimes even too much for some people to just think about this stuff in terms of what's happening in our very own backyard!)




EDIT: so, it WAS the great day i was referring to earlier. then came some not-so-hot news that i sort of foresaw. basically, i might be getting screwed over by the system of a small school, in my last semester of classes, w/ the most important class before student teaching. but then again, i might not be. no, i probably won't be. i need to remain positive about this. there's no way they'd get away with letting me slip through the cracks... all will be ok... *sigh*

Representing BV, a little bit of everywhere

Representing BV, a little bit of everywhere
Originally uploaded by LeishaJo.

So, guess who's featured as one of the people who "took a giant step" while being here at BVU, in the new 2006 BVU promotional viewbook called "Take Giant Steps: Buena Vista University"? Yeah, that's me in the pic, lookin' sort of dorky if you ask me, but apparently the photographers liked the pic or they wouldn't have edited that one on top of the Plaza de Espana backdrop! That's my study abroad journal in my hand, something I wrote in rather faithfully. And the best part of all, perhaps, is the spelling of my name (first name). Check it out. Great, huh? As well as the way they make me sound like I wrote the paragraph (I certainly didn't)... but oh well... mistakes happen. Neat to be in my fourth publication since being at BV, though-- and particularly to be featured this time around! BV's far too good to me...

laptop lifestyle

back to living the bv life of having a laptop at one's fingertips at basically every moment of the day. a bit exagerrated, maybe but it's close to the way things really are. for those of you who don't know, bv gives out new, updated laptops every 2 years. entering as a freshman when i did, with a used laptop, that means 2 switches, and 3 different laptops, in the course of my college career. this one takes the cake so far. it's a smooth silver gateway centrino duo, wide-screen, and strangely enough (at least strangely for me), it automatically puts itself into standby when the lid is closed-- or even halfway put down. and, automatically starts itself back up when it's opened again. hmm. not sure what to think about that one yet. anyway, i'll have to be doing quite a bit of putting pics back onto the laptop from my discs (which i didn't start making until last night, so needless to say, i didn't get much sleep, as switchout was 8am today), but for now, i like the newness and freshness of the laptop. think i might wait a little while on that one.

new laptop momentary happiness set aside, i'm a little distraught about the price of college textbooks, although that's nothing new. i got all that i could on amazon.com, but couldn't escape the fact that i couldn't find everything on there, or the prices were basically the same so i may as well just buy it at the bookstore (guaranteed they'll be in good shape). somehow the bill made itself stretch up to 300-something dollars-- and that wasn't even all of my books. oh, good grief. no wonder people from lower socioeconomic categories think they can't afford to go to college. it's really ridiculous, and this is coming from a person who's extremely enabled in terms of being able to afford anything and everything i need for my educational experiences. (i may not have a new car or the most expensive shoes or jeans, but by golly, i'm gettin' me a damn good education!!!)

so ra training has begun, with mornings starting at 8 or 9am almost daily, and the evenings (will be) stretching until 9 or sometimes 10pm. the hours in-between? almost jam-packed. one might think ra training is a piece of cake. well, ok, maybe it is, but not in terms of schedule. this week we're worked crazy to the brim, and next week, there's more of a break, since by that time we will have had to have learned about everything since about 500 students will already be on campus by then. then a day off, then back to training, then... drum roll, please... the start of the 2006-2007 school year. oh, yes. it's really here.

my room is smaller than normal but quite comfy, although currently without any form of carpet. (sad.) still working on getting stuff up on the walls... but i've gotten a few things up... and for anybody who knows me well, that's quite impressive in itself. i've got a great book collection on display, now if only i could find the time to read them all throughout the year (or even, one or two or three would be mighty nice). i'll make the time... that's what i'll do. si se puede!


all for now. blessings and peace!

just a little thought

i refuse to be defined by the limits of my own imagination
___________

besides that, here's a song i just can't get enough of:
seasons of love, by the cast of rent. lyrics:

Five hundrend twenty five thousand
six hundred minutes
Five hundrend twenty five thousand
moments so dear
Five hundrend twenty five thousand
six hundred minutes
How do you measure, measure a year

In daylights, in sunsets, in midnights,
in cups of coffee, In inches, in miles
in laughter in strife,

In Five hundrend twenty five thousand
six hundred minutes
How do you measure a year in the life

(chorus)
How about Love
how about love
how about love
measure in love
seasons of love
seasons of love

(female solo)
Five hundrend twenty five thousand
six hundred minutes
Five hundrend twenty five thousand
journeys to plan
Five hundrend twenty five thousand
six hundred minutes
how do you measure the life of a woman
or a man

(male solo)
In truth that she learned
or in times that he cried
In the bridges he burned
or the way that she died

(all)
Its time now, to sing out
though the story never ends
lets celebrate remember a year
in the life of friends

remember the love
remember the love
remember the love
measure in love
seasons of love
seasons of love

victoria, and packing up for my last year at bv

i'm going to have to agree with erica brooks about how ridiculous prices are in victoria's secret. i did much the same thing-- went in with that special little card that said "free panty!" and "$10 off any body bra." hey, can't pass up an opportunity like that, especially not at vicky's (i always say that if i ever make money someday, i'm going to shop there all the time; i love their stuff!). but finding a bra that could still be affordable for a poor college student like me (and keep in mind, there were NO CLEARANCE ITEMS IN THE STORE; i almost didn't know what to do with myself), even after a $10 discount, was no easy task. there were a select few up on one wall that were quite obviously the cheapest in the store. now granted, cheap at victoria's secret is still good quality, and with that, still expensive. but it was really my only hope for getting to successfully use this special little promotional deal. so, i bought it, along with my "free panty" (have i ever mentioned that i really am not fond of the word 'panty'? it's far too girly for my tastes. i much prefer 'undies,' or even as erica says, 'knickers.' but that doesn't mean i'd withhold money from the store for using such a word...). oh, and of course, a new thing of victoria's secret love spell body wash, since i'm all out, except for a little bit left in the bottom of a travel-sized bottle. yummy. when i got up to the register with my newfound bra, undiegarment, and body wash, the nice girl informed me that if i got two more victoria's secret gardens items (like love spell), it'd be a "great deal" for the price of $23 (or around there). she was right, it would be a "great deal"... if i wanted or needed the other 2 to begin with. i've done that before; it's really NOT a great deal to do it and spend the 23 when 7.50 is enough in the first place (and don't give me that hooey about buying them as gifts!). and after all, need i really make them aware that i'm a poor college student and it's amazing enough that i can walk in there and just look around, let alone buy something?

i picked up bridesmaid dress #2 from rosie's bridal today. they speed-hemmed it and pressed it and all that jazz, and now it's officially mine. the unfortunate part about it all is that it has to survive two 6-hr car drives (one to bv, one back from bv) and being cramped into a little closet until mid-october, since i'll have to have the dress with me when i come home for the wedding (yeah, and miss classes for the wedding... argh! ok friends and family, getting married on a non-weekend is not allowed!). it's a pretty dress, but can't come anywhere close to tracy's selection of bridesmaids dresses. but then again, the wedding is in a different season (fall as opposed to summer), it'll be an outdoor wedding, and it's brown as opposed to blue. and not as poufy. and certainly not as heavy!!! so it's this mocha brown; a beautiful color, i think. halter on top, with this little slender belt thing around the waist (and a little diamond whatchacallit on the belt-- oh man-- i just can't describe, can i?), and long a-line basically to the floor. it no longer looks like i'll have to hold my breath for hours while wearing it, since they let the sides out a little bit. it zips now without my going through hell and back first, and my mid-section doesn't provide this bubble effect anymore (i know i'm shapely, thanks, but you know, dress, i really didn't need to be THAT shapely!). that was an issue i had w/ rosie's bridal in the first place, with them having me try on a dress my size that really wasn't anything AT ALL like the dress i'd be getting, and w/ knowing i'd return having lost some weight, i went w/ my normal size (it was fine after all at the time). so, i came back, tried on the REAL dress (same size as what i'd tried on) and it was even smaller than the one from before. and i'd even lost inches, not just weight. they basically acted as if it was my problem. (what!?) but anyway. the dress is paid for and in my full possession now, so we can all move along. now i just have to make sure it stays clean and semi-pressed, and make sure it still fits me normally come october. and then i miss classes to head home. grrrr. (but again, not that i'm bitter about that or anything.)

thanks to mom and dudley for a fun lunch; and thanks to dudley for the fine compliments (ha!). i'll get one of those J-words (J-O-B; gasp!) someday.

edit: i finally cleaned out my car. it wasn't terribly dirty compared to what it could have looked like, but it was dirty enough to drive me up a wall (but not literally... i think it'd crash before it literally drove me up a wall, and if it crashed, i think i'd be hiking to/from school).

time to pack up, pack the car up, and head back up to storm lake and move in for the last time during my undergrad college career. two semesters left, two very short semesters. i'm excited to get back into the dorms, and to have the room that i've been wanting to have since freshman year (yeah, it's true!-- but it's only an RA's room so i never thought i'd really get it)... although the floor's another topic (hoorah, i get to baby-sit the liberty drinking club... although bv's nudist and head of the club has transferred and will no longer be living there, so there might be hope), though i don't think it'll be too big of a problem since i tend to keep a good sense of humor as best as i can, and besides, my co-RA really rocks. the room's a bit smaller, w/ only one closet instead of two (oh my!, what's a girl to do?), but i think i'll survive. :) it's got a great view of the suites across the street, and trees, and the sort (much more enjoyable than a parking lot like last semester, although that has its upside to it, too). will look beautiful in the fall with the fallen leaves, in the winter with the snow, and in the springtime with the new flowers in bloom (is there a season when the bv campus doesn't look or feel gorgeous?).

ok, back to that packing thing.
love you all. leave comments, or visit me at bv! (so if you're low on time and money, then you'd better be leaving those comments, folks; you've got no other option.)

it's true

the watched pot never boils.

and on a completely different note, i leave for storm lake in just barely over a day, and i'm nowhere neeeear packed up and ready. where the heck did this summer go!?!?!?

mensajito para mari

tengo la clase de racismo y sexismo a las 12 en los lunes, miercoles, y viernes. lo mismo como tu, espero?

y... si, entiendo perfectamente que si haya ganas, entonces todo es posible. todo puede actualizar. vamonos ya a nuestra ciudad de los suenos! vamonos a cervantino! vamonos para pasar un ratito con nuestros amigos y pasear las calles tan bonitas...

textbooks, heck yeah

so, here are the textbooks for my classes this coming semester:

for edco 401: classroom management and evaluation
--student-involved classroom assessment
--comprehensive classroom management
--teacher man
--first days of school

for phil 361: racism and sexism
--women's voices, feminist visions
--race, class, and gender in the united states

for reli 345: nonviolence, peace, and justice
--nevertheless
--peace is the way (by wink not chupra-- turned out i didn't already have the book, after all)
--justice and peace
--american nonviolence: history of idea

for span 415: survey of latin american literature
--panoramas literarios: america hispana

so, when the majority of books that are going to be used for a class, look just like books i'd want to sit down with in my free time to read... that's a good thing, right?

this semester is going to kick some serious bum.

now, if only they could pull things together and get a professor to teach sally's old class, methods of teaching a secondary foreign language, so they wouldn't leave zach and myself hanging any longer... it's only the most important mandatory class before we student teach and graduate, and what would you know, there's currently nobody to teach it (since sally's not coming back). i'm trying not to worry about this... it'll come together, i'm sure...

Special campers=special conversations

So, some favorite (not-so-exactly-verbatim; you just can't ever capture it the way it was said in the moment w/ these hilarious people) conversations from Service Partnership out at camp this year:

Leisha and Pam:
L: Hi, Pam.
P: Hi, Pam.
L: I'm Pam?
P: That's right, hi, Pam.
L: You're Pam, too, Pam.
P: I'm Pam? (Moment of confused silence.) You like to tease me. You're not Pam, I'm Pam.
L: Ok, Pam.
(Repeat as desired)

Leisha and Katherine:
L: Hey, Katherine!
K: Well hey, girl!
(Every conversation started out like this... always a "well hey, girl!" as though we were the oldest of gal pals. I loved it!)

Paul Macy and Kathy (two special campers from the same group home) got legally married the Friday before camp started. They both came to camp with stuffed monkeys hanging around their necks like necklaces... one white monkey, like Paul, who's white, and one black monkey, like Kathy, who's black. As could be expected, Paul's monkey was named Paul. Makes me wonder what became of his stuffed animals from years past, of course, all named Paul.

Jeffrey and Leisha:
J: Alisha! (will he ever get my name right?)
L: Yes, Jeffrey?
J: Did anybody ever tell you you look just like Ellen Degeeeeeneres?... or maybe Meg Ryyyyan? (Slow and drawn out.)
(Repeat about fifty times a day. And every time somebody else comes around us, expect for him to let everybody else know that I look just like Ellen Degeneres or maybe Meg Ryan.)

Reggie and Leisha:
L: Hey, Reggie, buddy! What's up, man?
(Big hug)
R: Well you know sweetie, just stoppin' by to say hi to my girlfriends, you know how it goes, gotta give 'em some lovin', you know, baby?
L: Yeah, for real. So what have you been up to, buddy? Been keepin' busy?
R: Yeah, I'm been playin' some sports, you know.
L: Oh, right on. You been playin' some football?
R: Yeah, I'm been playin' some football.
L: Who you've been playin' with?
R: Well I've been playin' with the Kansas City Chiefs, of course.
L: Oh, yeah! Of course. Man, that's great. Well it's sure great to see you. You look great.
(Another big hug.)
R: Yeah, just had to come visit my girlfriends, you know?
L: Yeah, you've got plenty of them to visit, man.

Paul T and Leisha:
P: Hey, buttercup.
L: (Thinking: did he REALLY just call me BUTTERCUP!?!?)

Judy:
"I'm gonna tell Bobby on you, gonna tell him you've been teasin' me."

Armor and Leisha:
L: Hey Armor, how you doin'?
A: (Pause.) WONderful. (Silence.)
L: You want some water?
A: (Pause.) NO.
L: You OK, Armor?
A: (Pause.) YES.
L: Did you have a good time at camp this week, Armor?
A: (Pause.) YES.
L: Are you gonna miss us, Armor?
A: (Longer pause.) NO.
L: (Inner laugh... oh, man... Armor conversations are far, far, far too much fun...)

Kerri:
"I like this." (Referring to camp.)

Congrats, Jody!

My friend Jody has accepted a position as a YAV within the PC(USA) in Haines, Alaska, for this coming year, effective on August 30 when she takes off by plane, leaving her family's farm in South Dakota and arriving for an amazing year of learning and giving, growing and living. Congratulations, Jody... I love you, gal!

Blessed

Blessed
Originally uploaded by LeishaJo.

That's my brother, the groom!

That's my brother, the groom!
Originally uploaded by LeishaJo.

Scott and Tracy's big day... July 29th, 2006.

New sisters

New sisters
Originally uploaded by LeishaJo.

The L-Reynolds gals

The L-Reynolds gals
Originally uploaded by LeishaJo.

Hot feet

Feet in the water
Originally uploaded by LeishaJo.

Just coolin' off in the fountains of the KC Country Club Plaza...

Chris and me

Chris Sullivant and me
Originally uploaded by LeishaJo.

Scotty and me

Scotty and me
Originally uploaded by LeishaJo.

Ever had your ears full of shaving cream?
No?
I'm sure Scotty Johnson could hook you up; he sure did for me and several others on the first day of camp!!!!!

life, or something like it

so, consistency is definitely not a strongpoint of mine when it comes to this blogging thing. the sad part about it is that the more things i'm doing in my life, the less i'm blogging. one would think i'd have more to say, but i think i get so overwhelmed with it all happening so fast that i'm left just not knowing what to say except... "wow!" or, "what an amazing experience!" (i'm yet to have a really terrible experience... i mean, essentially, even my 4-day hospital stay in calcutta was one that i really enjoyed... how weird is that!?)

this summer has looked a bit like this:
--end semester.
--fly to india, two days later.
--india for 6 weeks: delhi, agra (gotta visit the taj, just gotta visit the taj), paunar (brahma vidya mandir ashram), sevagram (sevagram ashram), wardha, nagpur, kolkata (volunteering w/ missionaries of charity, hanging out in a hospital eating lots of mangoes w/ mother theresa's doctor as my own doctor), mumbai (monsoon, and that was pretty much it, although i did get asked to be in a bollywood film and did an arseload of shopping and watching the tour de france in a little sports cafe and drinking tea in barista while journaling).
--become a professional: boiled-water drinker, bottled-water drinker, ATM machine-user, squat toilet-user, rickshaw-hailing, rickshaw-riding with strangers on my lap and all around me, bargainer, bucket-showerer, terrible but merciless hindi speaker, chapatti and dal-eater, uber cheap budget hotel-dweller, hospital-perusing, vegetarian, socially conscious, liberally-minded peace studies advocate of sorts.
--turned 21 in india but forgot it was my birthday; was the most wonderful feeling to forget such a thing. was given a beautiful little pink flower as a birthday present, picked by a girl at the ashram, and thought it to be the most memorable present ever received.
--home from india
--weighed 15 pounds less than before india (oh yes, this is good)
--started an online course (christian sexual ethics... sweet!)
--recovered from jetlag and work on online course, simultaneously
--was a psuedo-actress for vacation bible school at my grandma's church, for a week
--decided that my bedroom here at home will never, ever be clean again (not if i keep traveling, and not if i keep doing this move home/move elsewhere thing/move back home thing
--spent a few days at andy's and em's place in columbia
--went to a bachelorette party... decided i'll never look at a man in a fireman uniform the same way ever, ever again... danced w/ my mom... rode in my first limo... drank my first smirnoff ice, green apple... took a shot w/ my mom (in the words of mom, "what kind of nipple was that?" "a slippery nipple, mom!" "oh yeah!"-- i've got incredible blackmail pictures, to boot)... woke up the next morning and go to church where i was the liturgist (convenient timing for that, huh?)
--spent hours and hours w/ dottie (strangely enough, my ex boyfriend's mother)
--went to starlight theatre w/ grandma, like every other summer
--bridal shower at my house; fun girly times
--marveled at the fact that my brother's really going to get married, and he was really going to wear a tux in the process
--watched my mom make about 20 cheesecakes for the wedding (yes, watched. i'm not quite the professional in the kitchen that she is... yet.)
--was a bridesmaid at my brother's wedding, which was the most gorgeous, well-planned event, ever (hoorah! i have a sister-in-law now!!!!! congrats, scott and tracy reynolds!!!!!)
--shared a dance with my father at the reception, for the first time, ever
--volunteered for a week at heartland, for service partnership. incredible experience, as always, particularly after 3 years away from the place i always considered to be my "home."
--watched a friend (who is really more like a brother to me) marry another friend (whom i worked with at camp), who is my age. i thought, how weird, people my age getting married already... how could one really be ready for that? i'm far from where i was a year or two ago, when something like that sounded good to me. maybe there's just too much in my life right now going on to really think about that sort of stuff. maybe that's for the best.
--saw my ex-boyfriend for the first time in almost two years. conversation was wonderful and comfortable and it was great to know that he's doing as well as what he is, where he is. also great re-affirmation of the fact that i've, indeed, moved on from where i once was.
--have sat for hours and hours at a little indie coffee shop w/ free wireless access, drinking organic green tea and ice water and getting coursework done on my laptop/writing endless emails/researching and whatnot
--have met somebody for lunch at a restaurant, and ended up in conversation that didn't allow us to leave until it was dinnertime, many cups of water and many bathroom breaks and laughs and discussions later
--have realized that i really only have a few good, loyal friends under the age of 25; the rest, range in age from 28 to 60, and those are really the people i enjoy spending time with the most.
--went to shakespeare in the park with bekah, was great to see her
--have considered graduate studies in peace education at the universidad para la paz (university for peace; it's united nations-affiliated) in san jose, costa rica
--have considered applying for the fulbright fellowship... hey, why not?
--have spent an hour or two in nature's pantry, a huge health foods store in independence, buying things like tofu and lentil and black bean soup and yerba mate in tea-bag form
--have expanded the amount of male friends i have with engineering degrees (what's with good men and engineering appearing from here, there, and just about everywhere? stop the insanity, please, for the sake of my own sanity)
--one good man i've remained in contact with (this month makes the 8th month), has presented a particular challenge to me that i've had to work through (and will continue working through). ever found yourself falling in love with somebody you probably will never be able to have due to any amount of circumstances? it's an adventure, to say the least, but i wouldn't trade it for anything (not this particular experience, anyway).
--have discovered the wonderful world of nitric oxide during dental work
--started the application process for post-college stuff... yav positions in guatemala and peru. (say some prayers for me, eh.)
--thought, "holy crap, i move up to school this weekend." (that's me right now. needless to say, i'm nowhere near ready.)

so all this leads me to where i am now. 21 years old, life flying by way too quickly, senior year approaching and me gasping for air to breathe. life's good, though... really good. i guess i could say that all in all, i have no complaints... just rollin' w/ the punches... takin' what God's givin' me, enjoying this journey called life and in no particular hurry to reach any particular destination as long as love, peace, joy, and friendship are on my side.