losing (or finding?) myself in service

i got to spend some time working on the habitat for humanity house today in storm lake; guess what i got to do!? roofing!!!!-- well, more like shingling. i LOVED it! i was up on a little shed, not flat in any sense of the word (but i stayed mostly on the tip of it), and got to do about 5 or 6 rows, total, of shingles on both sides... it reminded me greatly of my mission trip to kentucky years ago. i LOVED it! i am going to make it a goal to head out that way and help w/ painting sometime this week. i've been wanting to help w/ habitat for sooooo long... it's about time... i love working on that sort of stuff! :) (oh-- and i wasn't half bad at hammering the nails, either-- and wouldnt you know it, i'd done just fine and dandy until the VERY last nail when i finally hammered my fingers for the first time!... oh well, it was still fun!)

this evening i tried making mac and cheese w/ tuna, but for some reason i just wasnt hungry for it (yeah-- AFTER i'd made it) and so i didnt really eat any dinner at all. didnt bother me much though... but after a nap around 7pm, i woke up and just really needed to get out of my room (i was feeling sort of weird... sad... anxious... not really sure). so i got ahold of jody and we met down at the cent room. had breadsticks w/ ranch dressing and marinara sauce (mmmmm!) and a frappucino (vanilla, of course!). i got to listen to some of michael w. smith's new songs on his newest CD, and what would you know... turns out that jody and i will be traveling to sioux falls, south dakota, on monday night to see his christmas concert!!!! (he'll be there w/ point of grace and the katinas!) incredible... we got nosebleed seats, but who cares-- just as long as we're there! it'll be about a 2 1/2 hr drive each way-- but oh so worth it-- and i think we both deserve the break! not to mention an amazing opportunity to worship God... yay!!!!!!

i am very thankful for jody and our friendship. i am thankful for a lot of things. like today- it was such a beautiful day outside. i could've stayed on that shed's roof forever, hammering my little heart out. and even tonight-- only had to wear a sweatshirt-- and the stars were out, so overlooking schaller chapel and the forum lawn-- wow, there's just no way to describe it. definitely reason to give thanks. just the fact that i CAN attend a college (esp. the one of my choice) is reason enough to be forever thankful. i truly am blessed... and i'm trying to make the best of my experience. (hence, it's saturday night, midnight, and i'm working on homework. but that's just the way i am... *smiles* some call me boring, some call me dedicated. i don't mind, either way. i'd rather be doing homework than going out and getting smashed like so many people seem to be doing tonight-- i know this b/c i can hear almost everyone walking outside my window-- yelling and being inappropriate and such... but different people have different ways of enjoying themselves. my way was spending some gal time w/ jody in the cent room this evening, listening to mws, just talking. that's what i call real. i am thankful for the opportunity to be real!

so i read on boundless.org (GREAT site; christian college-aged site) that, after a good relationship is over, it takes at least half of the length of the relationship to cope... looks like this'll be an interesting next 9 months, then. :-S nah... i know God's going to carry me through this. i have absolutely no idea what is in store for me. it could be good, it could be bad. i guess that's all a part of life... hanging on for the ride; trusting God w/ the reigns. i'm holding on tight. (God, just please don't let go of those reigns!)

i can't believe christmas is just 20 days away. where in the world did this year go!? seems like '04 just got started. wow........ can YOU believe that '05 is almost here? geesh, i'm going to be 20 soon. i love that thought. 20--two whole decades. it sounds so much better than 19. i hate being considered a "teen." i am a young adult, not a teen. notice that "twenty" has no "teen" in it- thank goodness! soon, soon, soon... 20 will be here. i don't even care a bit about 21. don't really plan on drinking, anyway. but just to be considered "not a teen." yessss!

nighty night, friends......