"for the moments i feel faint"

"am i at the point of no improvement?
what of the death i still drown in?
i try to excel but i feel no movement.
can i be free of this unreleasable sin?

never underestimate my jesus.
you're tellin' me that there's no hope
i'm tellin' you you're wrong.
never underestimate my jesus.
when the world around you crumbles
he will be strong, he will be strong...

i throw up my hands, oh the impossibilities.
frustrated and tired, where do i go from here?
now i'm searchin' for the confidence i lost so willingly
overcoming these obstacles is overcoming my fears.

(chorus)

i think i can't, i think i can't,
but i think you can, i think you can...
(repeat)
gather my insufficient seasons, place them in your hands,
place them in your hands, place them in your hands...

(chorus)
he will be strong... he will be strong... he will be strong..."


my thoughts on this beautiful, sunshine-filled morning: relient k's song speaks to me in more ways than one. i have been filled w/ these negative, harmful thoughts- and they seem to come from out of nowhere. has it been my surrending to satan and his lies? oh, what lies he tells... what horrible things he does to people (what horrible things he makes them think) who need jesus the most. this song says "i think i can't"... "but i think you can." i just have to place it in Jesus' hands. i feel like i've done that a million times already but it's like we keep playing hot-potato w/ it...

i went to bed listening to kenny g's christmas album (the only thing that put me in my happy spot last night) and woke up w/ the sun shining in and my alarm going off. i so badly was hoping to have received an email or something but there was nothing- it was so easy for me to get down emotionally- but no... my prayer is, "Father, forgive me, and take this from me." i so badly regret something i said/did last night (my impulsive comment) and wish i could take it back. where is forgiveness? i can do this... i can face today... b/c when the world around me crumbles, he will be strong (Jesus will be!!!). i need to remember this. Oh, God, help me to remember this.