Corazon

Donde esta mi corazon, originally uploaded by Leisha Jo.

And for some reason I'm just never able to stop thinking about this place.

Like mom, like daughter

Like mom, like daughter, originally uploaded by Leisha Jo.

Something else that's happened lately that was quite exciting: Mom came up to cook for the weekend Women's Conference-- and as to be expected, it was the BEST meal any of us had ever had at a college conference/retreat! It was so awesome to have her there, food or not...........

Naokochan and me

Naoko returns to BV, originally uploaded by Leisha Jo.

Here are a few things that have happened recently. One: Naoko returned to the States to visit me! Well, not just me, but other friends, as well-- but when she was here in Iowa, she stayed with me! Was so great to get to see her after just a year.

defeat

i will not be defeated by one person's bitterness, one person's anger, one person's lack of self-confidence.

i will not be defeated.

i will NOT be defeated.

this, too, shall pass. and these tears shall dry.


mantra: if i'm alive tonight, then it was a good day. if i'm alive tomorrow night, then tomorrow will have been a good day, too.

about 31 days left of this hell.
i can do this, right? (really. most days i don't know. that's why i'm asking.)

halt

when you're too

hungry
angry
lonely
tired

it's time to come to a (see bold letters).

__________________
this very cold day in northwest-of-nowhere iowa found me back at the church i've missed for quite some time, in support of this year's mexico awol trip participants, in conversation with the art teacher from the middle school and fully supported by her, my parents, and my grandma (all of which i received phone calls from today... thank you to each of you!). moments have found me tempted to return my thoughts to where they've been this past week, rolling around in the hellaciousness of my student teaching experience thus far, where nothing positive has resulted yet nor will anything positive result, but i've been surrounded by people who are praying for me, listening to me when i just need a set of ears, and just generally cheering me on. i realized today i can only get so much done in one day and had to re-create my to-do list, marking off the things that had to do with cleaning my room and finishing unpacking, and focusing on what's happening with the student teaching situation as well as reading for my class from 6-9 tomorrow night (which i did instead of watching the superbowl-- didn't even see a single commercial; oh well). i've delegated my door decs to a resident/friend who is a graphic design major, which allows me to release that from my mind as something else i need to get done, and offers her an extra outlet for creativity and experience.
__________________
i've decided that nobody can take away my dreams, my passions. nobody. period.

and i've learned
again
that all, and i mean ALL, people are placed in my life for a reason. and sometimes, as another is placed in my life for a reason, i am also placed in theirs for a reason. the cycle is amazing. today i saw it happen, right before my very eyes.

support
thank you, friends and family

prayers
i'll accept any and all, from anybody and everybody.

must continue on..........

the sum of my past week

You know i haven't had the best of days
but i want to stop and thank You anyway

every single moment when you sleep and you're awake
it's Your creation, and what You've made is good

i don't always thank You for the rough days and the hard times in my life
even though i should

--jury duty, by the supertones

i can't exactly say what made this past week (and my very first week) of student teaching feel like such a hell, besides the fact that it has everything to do with a co-op i have, but i can say that these are the lyrics i've been trying to keep in my head. easier said than done when my entire being feels permeated with the shittiness of the situation but........... there's always an end to these things........ even if it's far down the road, i know that in less than 8 weeks i will be moving on to another location and, more particularly, a new (and actual) professional to work with. endure what's here now, even if it crushes me. remember why i'm student teaching in the first place, and don't let her take that away from me, no matter what. 8 weeks is a very minute portion of my life, although it seems like an eternity at the moment. will be relying on prayers and hope... and accepting both from anybody who happens to stumble across this post.