i appreciate good family conversations

yes, just a couple of my favorite easter family get-together conversations:

grandma: (concerned look on her face, leaning close toward me so only i could hear her, but speaking loudly enough for the neighbors down to road to hear her) "leisha, you look like you've been gaining some weight."
me: (oh-so-pleasant smile on my face) "yes, actually, i have gained weight, as it's been a very stressful semester for me; thank you for noticing."
g-ma: "well i thought it'd looked like you'd gained some weight."
me: (another pleasant smile; can you imagine?)

great uncle bill: "leisha, do you have a car?"
me: "yep, i have a car."
gub: "is it the same car you've had?"
me: "yep, it's the same car."
gub: "you mean you haven't wrecked it yet?"
me: (a sort of "what??" look on my face) "nope, i haven't, why do you ask?"
gub: "well i just thought you'd be the first to wreck your car by now..."
me: "nope, haven't wrecked it, thanks for that vote of confidence though, uncle bill, i appreciate it."

and then i proceeded to travel to cool crest to play the worst game of miniature golf in my life. even my grandma beat me (the other grandma-- the one who'd probably find a much more creative way to tell me i've gained weight-- God bless her soul). oh, good times with the reynolds family.